A big event in the West household: Loretta is about to turn 16. She can now legally leave school…but not if her parents have their way. Both Wolf and Cheryl insist that Loretta must stay in school.

Cheryl worries about Loretta: so smart, but so secretive and not like a normal teenager. She doesn’t go out and she doesn’t have any friends.

And with this yard, we give you the luck of the Wests.Grandpa

Pascalle is no longer interested in the Video Hut. Loretta despairs, faced with school, when Pascalle suggests she should just do like the rest of the family – get herself expelled.

At Shadbolt High, Loretta makes determined and strategic attempts to behave badly. But her first effort is deemed a prank, her second just gets a warning. The third just earns her a one-day suspension. What does a girl have to do?

Loretta at last dishes out the dirt in the form of incriminating leaflets, at last persuading Ms Darling to expel her.

Cheryl is furious. She goes to the pub, unhappy and hoping for a little support from Kasey and Rochelle. Why is Loretta so difficult and anti-social? Because she’s gay! Or so the girls speculate.

Loretta, cheery after her expulsion, happily kicks out the grungy delinquent Jools who’s been hanging about the Video Hut.

Cheryl decides to spend some time with Loretta. Shopping. Loretta’s resistance to such traditional girlish joys only increases Cheryl’s suspicions about her daughter’s sexuality.

At home, Wolf has news, excellent news… He’s contacted a school, a private school, which is willing to take Loretta – St Mary Ignatius. If she won’t go – there’s always the Wairarapa. He’s called Auntie Jeanette, Cheryl’s sister. Loretta is appalled… Auntie Jeanette is Closed Brethren and lives on a rural compound with the six cousins and psychotic Uncle Kees. It’ll mean bible study, barn raising, bread and water.

Loretta goes to the Video Hut and surveys the wreckage of her intended life – to find Jools there yet again. Loretta has the beginning of a brilliant idea…

She agrees to enroll at St Mary Ignatius.

At Loretta’s party, Jools arrives looking quite a lot like Loretta. Seeing Loretta and her new friend so close in their matching T-shirts and jeans does not reassure Cheryl, but Kasey and Rochelle think she’s handling Loretta’s ‘coming out’ reasonably well.

On Monday, Cheryl drops Loretta at school, but as soon as she’s out of sight of Cheryl, another girl steps out from the bushes, dressed in an identical uniform, with an identical school bag. It’s Jools who’s starting her first day at her new school as ‘Loretta West’.

At the Rusty Nail, Munter returns with a jug, as Van is onto something big, very big.

Van and Munter find the truck rumoured to hold the goods…heaps of crays. What a score! Van feels like he can get back in the good books with Wolf and proudly offers to cut his Dad in on this deal.

So Van and Munter set about selling their wares.

But the refrigerated truck is no longer cold – so they approach Eric to borrow some freezers. Once they start unloading the goods, Van panics. Chest freezers, man.

Van flashes back to oxygen deprivation at eight years of age when he was stuck in a similar sort of freezer. With sage Munter’s guidance, Van succeeds.

The freezers aren’t all that icy…well that’s because they’re modern freezers, you know, frost free. Doesn’t seem to hurt business…so far.

Eventually, there’s only one box left – just the right amount for Loretta’s party…

And it’s at the party that Van and Munter’s cellphones start to ring. And they keep on ringing… They have a number of unhappy customers. Ooops. Thanks for the freezers, Eric.