30 July

Sophi asks: i how can i get a small part in outrageous fortune even as an extra????

Hi Sophi,

We hire extras for Outrageous Fortune through acting agencies in New Zealand. The best way to get a small role on the series is to get yourself an agent.

Good luck!

29 July

Loretta’s Blog

Sometimes it pays to be nice to the needy, to those less fortunate than oneself; to those with learning difficulties and no social skills, for example. It’s a way of making you feel good about yourself.

But that only explains part of why I’ve agreed to manage my brother Van’s business.

Actually ‘business’ isn’t really the right word to describe the Tool Guys, because the word ‘business’ implies some degree of organisation. ‘Mobile disaster’ could be used to describe them. ‘Accident waiting to happen’ would be another phrase that pops into mind.

No, that’s unfair of me. When they started, sure, I would have bet money that they wouldn’t last two weeks without killing themselves and/or innocent civilians. At the very least, I would have figured that within a month they would have ended up in court after someone’s retaining wall failed to retain anything, including itself in an upright position.

But no, somehow Dumb and Dumber have actually managed to create something that, while not exactly what you’d call ‘working’, certainly hasn’t gone down in flames like everyone (not just me) predicted when the Tool Guys was born.

So that deserves some respect and respect is what I’ve given them by agreeing to take them by the hand and teach them the finer points of business – like how to run one. Yes, I’ll take a percentage of whatever they manage to earn, but that’s only fair. And no, I won’t rip them off. I solemnly promise. Besides there isn’t really enough coming in to make it worth ripping them off.

Call it something I’m doing from the goodness of my heart, if you want. Or, if you don’t buy that, call it practice – for the other little businesses I’m thinking of getting into. Like there’s this small-time cleaning company I’ve got my eye on. Nothing glamorous, I know, but they’ve got some good contracts and, hey, every office needs someone to clean it, right? Supply and demand are my Gods now.

Being on my own now, being forced to make my own way in the world (thanks, Dad) has made me see things differently. I’m getting way better at strategic planning.

Things are all good.

28 July

Sarah asks Antonia: Hi Antonia! You’re an amazing actress, you have a real talent for comedy! I was just wondering, however, what exactly is it that you and the others are always smoking, and drinking? Ginger beer? :P

Hi,

We use soft drinks mostly. The beer is actually beer, but with little – 2% alcohol in it!

The cigarettes are herbal (called Honey Rose), so definitely not real!

28 July

Deanne asks: Hello I am a a huge fan of the show, i live in Sydney Australia and watch on Pay TV. Can you tell me the brand of Sunnies Cheryl wears they are HOT !!! Thanks

Cheryl wears Versace sunglasses. The models of the two colours she’s worn on the show are:

Brown – 4045-V gb1/8g. Small 120.
Black – 4045-V gb1/18.

27 July

What is a Man

At Lloyd’s fight night, Grandpa is disturbed that Wolf seems to be making a play for Cheryl. Sheree isn’t happy either, and as a result, she pashes Van.

Van shares the worrying incident with Munter, who points out that a pash, even an auto-pash is bad on two fronts: Sheree is Wolf’s missus, and it’s a breach of the Tool Guy Code. But the Tools have bigger worries: they find that a number of their jobs have been stolen by some builder called Rob, from Rob’s Jobs. They decide that they need to find this Rob and deal to him. Except – how to find him?

I know a frustrated man when I see one.Grandpa

Loretta assists the hopeless Tools – and they’re appalled to find – Rob is a chick, working with another chick, called Sam. This is mighty confusing and leaves Van and Munter in a quandary. How do they deal with Rob, when they can’t smack chicks? Kasey offers to take on the lezzie builders, but now they find further betrayal. Loretta has hired them to build shelves. Van and Munter confront Rob and Sam at the pub, but any reasoned negotiation goes out the window when Munter gets into a fight with an unrepentant Sam. Loretta offers her solution: which is to take over the business and run it properly, but Munter won’t have it, and his new plan includes rescinding the code about smacking chicks. Van’s not keen, but then a couple of disturbing things happen. Sheree again seems to be putting the moves on him, and Rob calls wanting to meet. Van decides not to share this with the angry Munter, and goes to meet Rob to sort the turf war. And finds she’s not such a bad chick.

But when Van proudly informs Munter of his very successful negotiation, Munter isn’t happy to find that Van ignored their plan, and further slept with the enemy. Van feels aggrieved, but Munter feels betrayed and things end badly. Van shares his worries with Loretta, who points out that he could take over the business with her help, but Van feels he has to make up with Munter. As he works out Munter’s whereabouts, Van forms a nasty suspicion, which he finds is the awful truth. Munter has been on with Imogen! Van is appalled, Munter is guilty – but Loretta uses the information to force the Tool Guys to come under her management.

Grandpa, meanwhile, fears that Judd is suffering from critical sperm build up. He needs to take things in hand with Cheryl, and himself. Judd is irritated, but also goaded. He asks Cheryl out, she finds there are strings. He still wants that apology. This does not go down well with Cheryl. Grandpa gives her a talking to, but when Cheryl insists she’s not interested in Wolf or Judd, Grandpa decides on plan B. Time for Judd to find himself another woman! Judd’s appalled to find this is Pascalle, but Grandpa has another alternative. Judd finds Grandpa has taken money from likely ladies for an introduction. When Judd isn’t keen, the ladies demand their money back. And when Grandpa won’t cough up, a brawl ensues, and Judd has to intervene. This brings him to the attention of a young D, Zoe. Judd is pleased when there are no charges, but in return she suggests that he buy her a drink.

Now Cheryl sees Judd drinking with Zoe, and Judd sees Cheryl see him. And Judd comes to a decision. He goes to see Cheryl, and they get it on – though the matter of that apology is still outstanding. Grandpa is pleased to find that critical build up is over and is happy to take full credit.

  • Gutter Black

    (David McArtney)
    Southern Music Publ. Co. (A’Asia) Pty. Ltd

    Performed by Hello Sailor

    Courtesy of Zodiac

  • Want You Bad

    (The Rock and Roll Machine)
    Control

    Performed by The Rock and Roll Machine

    Courtesy of The Rock and Roll Machine

  • Dirt N’ Stars

    (D Solomon / L Catlin)
    Control

    Performed by Payola

    Courtesy of Payola

  • Amsterdam

    (B Saunders)
    Native Tongue Music Publishing

    Performed by Barry Saunders

    Courtesy of Barry Saunders/Mana Music

  • Call It A Day

    (A Thorne)
    Control

    Performed by Splitter

    Courtesy of Double Happy Music