It’s home movie time in the West basement, where Loretta is intrigued to see footage of Grandpa’s old crime gang in 1969. But this is no walk down memory lane – Grandpa’s on his mission to find the bastard who knocked up Rita, and on the evidence of the footage his prime suspect is . . . Bilkey. Judd isn’t impressed, but offers to find the guy in order to prevent violence. Loretta comes to share Judd’s concern when she finds Grandpa plans to fillet the culprit with a grapefruit knife. So she steals the knife before Grandpa goes to meet Bilkey. Judd tries to warn Grandpa that Bilkey’s not likely to be the culprit and indeed gay Bilkey denies all knowledge. Undeterred, Grandpa turns to his next suspect – Phineas O’Driscoll. But as Loretta reviews the footage, she comes up with a new suspect of her own, the guy behind the camera . . . Who Grandpa says was the kid next door.

The evidence is a sausage roll, a touch on the shoulder, and a butt-pat, alleged.Judd

Cheryl meanwhile visits Danielle, and finds she’s leaving town as a result of threats to her and Robbie. If Cheryl was angry with Wolf before, now she’s determined to exact revenge. At the same time, Wolf is being forced to consider the horror of a mortgage and being Nicky’s employee. He resents both, but is in a bind. As Kasey is busy on the important case of ‘who is Rochelle’s mystery bonk’, Wolf arrives to present Sheree as Cheryl’s new employee for Hoochie Mama’s invisible party programme. Cheryl is furious at the idea, and it forces her into a decision. If Sheree wants to work it’s all legit, because the invisible party days are over. Kasey and Rochelle are pissed off to find this wasn’t just a ploy and blame Judd. Judd’s pleased until he finds that Cheryl’s motive was to get back at Wolf. Sheree however is happy to stick it to Cheryl by running a legit party, as Wolf negotiates his job title with Nicky. As a result, Wolf feels belittled – then aggrieved to find his home invaded by the knicker party. So he takes his woes to Cheryl, but his ploys to get her to backtrack on the invisible parties fail, so next he turns to Van – who isn’t keen to assist his Dad in any kind of crime venture. So Wolf is forced to go it alone to perk up his manly pride. But Cheryl finds Van’s decision wasn’t because of her house rules, because actually Van is kind of confused about those rules. At this, Cheryl decides it’s time for another of her family announcements. She’s irked when her family feel this sermon should be directed more at herself than anyone. Cheryl is also chagrined to find that Sheree’s party was a success, and her rival is prepared to grovel to get a job. Cheryl isn’t going to give her that satisfaction. So now Wolf and Sheree sign up for a mortgage, from Lloyd, no longer mobile because his car has been stolen (by Wolf). And we also find that Rochelle’s mystery lover is none other than Lloyd. Judd is mollified to find Cheryl has decided that going straight is what she needs to do for her own peace of mind rather than for revenge.

Grandpa, meanwhile, has left the house ready to wreak his revenge – as Loretta realises that the knife is missing. She and Judd hurry to the hospital where Grandpa is threatening Phineas, who’s refusing to talk. Judd points out that there’s a good reason for this: Phineas has had a stroke. And Judd’s enquiries have revealed that Phineas couldn’t be the father because he was shooting blanks, and also that the real culprit is Bert Thompson. Grandpa is appalled, partly because Bert is dead. All he can do is piss on his memory, literally. But Loretta is not fooled by Judd’s finesse and now wants the truth. So Loretta meets Vern from the council, who, it transpires was the kid next door and also the Rita Rooter. He is amazed to meet Loretta, the image of her grandmother. He doesn’t imagine she’d want to see him again. But, to his surprise, she would like to…