The best laid plans – and trust me, my plans are always the best (and don’t even think about making a ‘laid’ joke about now) – are, inevitably, only as good as their weakest link.

And the weakest link, in my experience, is usually a human.

The important thing is picking which human will be the one to fuck things up and to minimize the impact of that particular human. They are usually weak because they let their hearts get in the way of their heads and/or their heads in the way of their instincts and/or their dicks in the way of rational behaviour.

It doesn’t help, either, when the even-more-weakest link in the whole sorry mess is the stupid blonde slag you’re trying to save.

At this point in time it is advisable to have a Plan B.

I always have a Plan B.