It’s the hypocrisy about drugs that gets me. Those people who run around saying “drugs are bad, drugs are bad” as they suck down more nicotine and pour themselves another rum to top up the alcohol levels in their bloodstream. Hypocrites!

And if you happen to point out that there must be something good about drugs otherwise people wouldn’t keep doing them, everyone jumps up and down and has a fit about it, because you can’t point out the obvious when it comes to drugs because that might make people do them more. More hypocrisy!

Okay, I confess, I’m a bit stoned right now, as I write this, but only in the name of research. But I have to tell you it is really good research. Really really good. About the only things wrong I can tell from this drug, right here and now, is that it causes occasional lapses in judgement and sometimes you get so carried away with the stone that you don’t see what is going on right in front of your fucking face.

But those are a couple of minor side-effects compared to the whole goodness here and I’m over that shit now. Now I’m thinking what can be so wrong about feeling this good? I’m not worried about anything or anyone else or what they’re doing or who they’re with. It is all good in my world right now.

My family are total drug hypocrites. For years various members of my family have smoked and drunk themselves senseless, while all the time Mum and Dad were mouthing off about how we’d never sell drugs because that is bad. As opposed to steal shit which is somehow good? How does that work? Meanwhile my brother is trying to ingest every illicit substance known to man. Except P, of course. Even Van isn’t dumb enough to do P because that shit is evil and wrong. Also he loves sleeping.

I’m a hypocrite too, I guess, when it comes to drugs. I’ve always thought that party pills were for losers; that they’re just drugs for people who pretend to take drugs so they can impress their equally lame friends. But here I am, whacked off my nut on a pill, babbling away to anyone who will read this shit about how good these pills are. What a fucking hypocrite I am!

But I don’t feel bad about it. I don’t feel bad about anything right now, even going into business with a prick like Hayden Peters – and Jethro too, even though he’s a total tool. And that’s how good these pills are and as soon as we find a name for them, you can find out for yourself. Nice.